Climate Recon Team - From the Journal

These are excerpts from my journal written during the Climate Recon Team (CRT) expedition to Glacier National Park as well as reflections since returning back to "society." This experience would not have been possible without the employees of our many sponsors, supporters, as well as Stacy Bare of the Sierra Club's Mission Outdoors - Military Families and Veterans Initiative and Nick Watson of Veterans Expeditions. The CRT was made up of active military and veterans and led by world-class mountaineer Conrad Anker and award winning photographer, Jim Balog (Extreme Ice Survey.) I am, as always, forever grateful to all of you.

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August 11, 2012

Just did my initial interview. It wasn't hard... but it wasn't easy. I tried not to break down but I still do - always.

There's so much I feel like people could hear and I want so much to share how important and valuable I think this experience is and is going to be. From Afghanistan, to gardening, to doing my physical training outdoors, to exploring New Zealand - nature is the one place that affords me a sense of peace.

After the interview, Stacy, Jim and the camera guys (Rob, Anjin and Matt) all thanked me. Jim walked with me as I was leaving and said he'd done a lot of speaking and research, for years, on the therapeutic nature of the outdoors to include studying many perspectives in the field. He said that he'd never heard anyone connect the outdoors to healing as eloquently as I had.

I awkwardly thanked him for saying so because I'm sure had he not done so, I would have walked away feeling like an idiot and second guessing myself for every word that I'd said. He hugged me and told me not to - "It was perfect."

I had to come and write this down in my journal because I know that I'll forget it and I want to remember this moment.

Gotta get back to organizing my gear. Tomorrow we're heading up to Grinnell Glacier...

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I remember feeling embarrassed even though I wasn't the only one in tears. The film crew gave heartfelt thanks, too and I walked away trying to regain my composure but hold on to the significance of that moment so I could process it. The reason it was so important to write down what Jim had said was because I would forget it in the moments following the interview. I don't retain compliments well, but I want to start being more gracious and appreciative of them. Compliments are...

Ithaca & The Odyssey

I'm trying to start a new routine/habit of taking a few moments in every morning for myself and no one else. I've cleared a sacred space in my favorite place, the patio, and I drink a steaming cup of PG Tips (w/ cream & sugar, please) and search for the day's inspiration. This AM, I found it in my new O Magazine and from none other than Martha Beck and I had to share;

"Of course, even after Odysseus's homecoming, he had to keep adventuring, to manage a kingdom filled with pretenders and thieves. But his journey had made him comfortable with uncertainty and improvisation. He mapped out yet another plan, routed his competitors, reclaimed his position, and rejoined his beloved wife. Then he ruled wisely and well, not in spite of his troublesome journey but because of it. Odysseus's destination was Ithaca, but his destiny was The Odyssey."

"You, too, were born to become yourself by creating the experiences you live. Generations from now, your descendants will unroll the tattered map of your life, partly to celebrate your legendary homecoming, but mostly to remember the odyssey that was your real purpose all along."

Sometimes, I feel like she's channeling, that Martha woman. But more than anything, I feel like she 'gets' us.

To all my veterans - read those words again and dwell for a moment in the thoughts they bring forth. YOU ARE NOT YOUR PAST or the things that happen(ed) to you BUT WE ARE stronger for what we've witnessed and experienced.

And through those experiences, we've all been given the tools to achieve great measures of success, however our souls define it, should we choose to do so. I don't just believe that - I KNOW it.

Originally published on May 22 @ FB.